1st Jokes / Recent Jokes
Sardar talking on cell.
2nd Sardar: Kis se baat kar raho ho.
1st Sardar: Biwi se…
2nd Sardar: Itne… Pyaar se?
1st Sardar: Tumhari hai…
Being a parent changes everything. But being a parent also changes with each baby. Here are some of the ways having a second and third child is different from having your first. Your Clothes 1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.
2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible. 3rd baby: Your maternity clothes ARE your regular clothes. & Preparing for the Birth 1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously. 2nd baby: You don`t bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn`t do a thing. 3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month. & The Layette 1st baby: You pre-wash your newborn`s clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby`s little bureau. 2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains. 3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can`t they? & Worries 1st baby: At the first sign of distress - a whimper, a more...
Two men met while both where looking for their lost wives.
1st: How yours look like?
2nd: She is 5"7, 36-24-36, Fair, Black eyes. What about yours?
1st: Forget mine. Lets find yours!!
Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.
He shoots his friend to death.
Wife says, "If you behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends".
Small Boy wrote to Santa Claus," send me a brother"
Santa wrote back," SEND ME YOUR MOTHER"
What is the definition of Mistress?
Someone between the Mister and Mattress
Husband asks, "Do u know the meaning of WIFE??
"Without Information Fighting Everytime"
Wife replies," No, It means,
"With Idiot For Ever! !!"
Three Feelings:
What's the difference between stress, tension and panic?
Stress is when wife is pregnant,
Tension is when girlfriend is pregnant, and
Panic is more...
3 scientists happen to meet each other by chance at a party, an American, a Russian, and a Pakistani.
They boast their country`s science achievements. The Russian says: We were the 1st ones in space,
the American says, we were the 1st to go to moon,
The Pakistani thinks hard and says: we will be 1st ones on the sun!
Both the American and Russian start laughing, and say to the Pakistani, you stupid the sun is too hot, your spaceship will burn b4 it reaches the sun.
The Pakistan scientist remains cool and calm, and says: You are stupid. We will go there at night!!!
One day there was a boy at school and his teacher told him to get 4 spelling words.
1st he went to his Brother and asked “Could you give me a spelling word? ” His Brother answered “ShutUp” So he wrote down Shutup.
2nd he went to his Mother and asked her. She answered “Certainly” He wrote down certinly.
3rd he wen to his Dad and asked for somthing sweet. His dad answered Lolipop so he wrote down Lolipop.
4th he went to his little brother and asked the question. He answered “In my Little Blue Car”
The next day he went to school and his teacher asked for the words. He said his 1st word Shutup. Then she asked “Do you want to go to the principles office? ” He said is second word “Certainly”. In the principals office the principal asked what do you think you deserve, the boy answered “Lolipop!! ” Then the principal asked “What do you think your punishment should be? ” The boy answered “To go in my Little Blue Car!!!! ”
Q: How many 1st AD's does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Why are you asking me that question? Can't you see I'm busy!
1st Monster: What is that son of yours doing these days? 2nd Monster: Hes at medical school. 1st Monster: Oh, whats he studying? 2nd Monster: Nothing, theyre studying him!