2nd Jokes / Recent Jokes

1st Officer: "Guess who I pulled over in a traffic stop the other day?"
2nd Officer: "Who?"
1st Officer: "Janet Jackson!"
2nd Officer: "What she do, was she speeding?"
1st Officer: "Nah, she had one headlight out."

Q: How many 2nd ADs does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Uh... standby, Ill check on that.

Amazing Eyesight Two Men Are Talking. 1st Man-My Eyesight Is So Good That I Can See 5 Km Away! 2nd Man-O, Thats Nothing! My
Eyesight Is So Good That I Can See Thousands Of Kilometres Away. 1st Man- But Thats Impossible. 2nd Man- It Is Possible. When
I Get Up In The Morning, I See The Sun Which Is Thousands Of Kilometres Away!

1st Monster: What is that son of yours doing these days? 2nd Monster: He's at medical school. 1st Monster: Oh, what's he studying? 2nd Monster: Nothing, they're studying him!

Teacher: Can anyone tell me how many seconds there are in a year? Pupil: 12 - 2nd January, 2nd February...!

Last name: _________________
First name:
(Check appropriate box)
[_] billy bob [_] Bobby-Sue
[_] Billy-Joe [_] Bobby-Jo
[_] Billy-Ray [_] Bobby-Ann
[_] Billy-Sue [_] Bobby-Lee
[_] Billy-Mae [_] Bobby-Ellen
[_] Billy-Jack [_] Bobby-Beth Ann Sue

Age: ______ (if unsure, guess)

Sex: _____M_____F_____Not sure

Shoe Size: _____Left_____Right

Occupation:
[_] Farmer [_] Mechanic
[_] Hair Dresser [_] Waitress
[_] Unemployed [_] Dirty Politician

Spouse's Name_________________________
2nd Spouse's Name: _________________
3rd Spouse's Name: _________________

Lover's Name: ________________________
2nd Lover's Name: ___________________

Relationship to spouse:
[_] Sister [_] Aunt
[_] Brother [_] Uncle
[_] Mother [_] Son
[_] Father [_] Daughter
[_] Cousin [_] Pet

Number of children living in household: _____
Number more...

A father was buying bass lessons for his son.
The 1st week the father asked him what he had learned
The son said "On my 1st lesson we learned about the E string"
The 2nd week came and after the lesson the father asked what had he learned that week
The son said "On my 2nd lesson I learned about the A string"
3rd week came by and the father said to his son "You know these are expensive lessons what have you learned this week"
The son said "I quit the lessons I already got a gig"