Arizona Jokes / Recent Jokes
Yesterday Barack Obama spoke to thousands of people in Germany about the need for global cooperation on terrorism. In Columbus, Ohio, John McCain, talked about the economy with local business owners at a German restaurant. Meanwhile, presidential candidate Ralph Nader spoke to a neighbor about global warming while walking his German shepherd.
President Bush and Sen. John McCain have reached a tentative deal concerning the treatment of prisoners according to the Geneva Conventions against torture.
Bush will continue doing what he wants, and McCain will keep his mouth shut unless he wants to, "take a little trip down memory lane."
I feel bad about the way Joe the Plumber has been treated by the media. I haven’t seen a pile on like that since the last Jenna Jameson movie.
You know you`re in Arizona when. ..
*You no longer associate bridges (or rivers) with water.
*You can say 110 degrees without fainting.
*You eat hot chilies to cool your mouth off.
*You can make instant sun tea.
*You learn that a seat belt makes a pretty good branding iron.
*The temperature drops below 95, you feel a bit chilly.
*You discover that in July, it takes only 2 fingers to drive your car.
*You discover that you can get a sunburn through your car window.
*You notice the best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.
*Hot water now comes out of both taps.
*It`s noon in July, kids are on summer vacation, and not one person is out on the streets.
*You actually burn your hand opening the car door.
*You break a sweat the instant you step outside at 7: 30 a. m. before work.
*No one would dream of putting vinyl upholstery in a car or not having air conditioning.
*Your biggest bicycle wreck more...
The internet site was created to help homeless persons get back on their feet. The Web site also is a venue where visitors can donate money, services and goods to help. The first recipient is described as a heavily bearded man, poorly dressed, un-bathed, and reeking of alcohol. So far $2,578 dollars has been raised for Joaquin Phoenix
The following is supposedly a true story relating to an actual event that took place during a flight.
As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day, the co-pilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system.
"Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed when a lump of nickel and iron, roughly 150 feet in diameter and weighing 300, 000 tons, struck the earth at about 40, 000 miles an hour, scattering white-hot debris for miles in every direction. The hole measures nearly a mile across and is 570 feet deep."
From the cabin, a passenger was heard to exclaim, "Wow! It just missed the highway!"
Last night Barack Obama's political commercial aired on NBC, CBS, FOX, and a few cable networks. In a counter move, tonight John McCain will appear in a commercial for Flomax.