Basketball Jokes / Recent Jokes

Gilbert Arenas has opted out of the final year of his contract with the Washington Wizards. The three-time All-Star is an ideal pick up for any team in need of a good blogger.

Q: Why is basketball the grossest sport there is?
A: Because they dribble all over the court.

The San Antonio Spurs beat the Wizards to wrap up a 19-day road trip. The players have been away from home for so long they can't even remember what their illegitimate children look like. That’s just a joke. They never remember what their illegitimate children look like.

These are actual sports quotes said by various people throughout the world.

Oiler coach Bum Phillips: When asked by Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips, Phillips responded, "Because she is too ugly to kiss goodbye."

New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season:"I want to rush for 1, 000 or 1, 500 yards, whichever comes first."

And, upon hearing Joe Jacoby of the' Skins say "I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen of the Raiders said, "To win, I'd run over Joe's mom too."

Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann 1996: "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."

Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh: "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes." Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: "You guys line up more...

A woman has pleaded no contest to stalking Lakers forward Luke Walton. The California resident has been sentenced to three years' probation, told to attend counseling, and encouraged to set her sights a little bit higher.

The cursing rate doubles for Mexicans who cross the border and become Clippers fans.

Allen Iverson could be back in a Philadelphia 76ers uniform by next Monday night. And complaining by next Tuesday.