California Jokes / Recent Jokes

What happens when the smog clears over southern California?
UCLA

JonBenet Ramsey murder suspect John Mark Karr arrived in Los Angeles after being flown business class from Thailand. A regretful Karr said that on reflection, confessing to the crime was probably not worth the double miles.

Joaquin Phoenix stated yesterday that he doesn't care if there are new restrictions on water usage. Whether the city likes it or not, he will continue to shower once a week.

2005 Ryan Seacrest gets star on Hollywood Walk of Fame
2006 Bruce Willis gets star on the sidewalk formerly known as the Hollywood Walk of Fame.

ALLEN GINSBURG VIRUS - Seemed to come from nowhere. Extremely virulent, yet ineffectual. Attempts to invade all file systems of worldwide media organizations at once. Generates copious, conflicting press reports via an advanced randomly-parsing syntax generator developed by California hackers. Frequently found to have infiltrated expensive Washington restaurants.
Anita Hill Virus - Lies dormant for ten years.
BARBARA BUSH VIRUS - One of the ugliest viruses we’ve seen in years, but
seems to have a nice disposition and does little damage.
Billy Graham Virus - When you save a file, it prints, “I am saved! ” to the screen.
Chicago Cubs Virus - Your PC makes frequent mistakes and comes in last in the reviews, but you still love it!
COLIN POWELL VIRUS - Makes its presence known, but doesn’t do anything. Secretly, you wish it would.
DAN QUAYLE VIRUS v 1. 0 - Thers sumthin rong wit yur kompueter, butt ewe jsut cant figyour out watt.
Dan Quayle more...

Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in ocean level won't cure.

In Baldwin Park, California nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.(Dumb Laws - California)