Californians Jokes

60 above
Floridians wear coats, gloves and woolly hats.
People in Canada sunbathe
50 above:
New Yorkers try to turn on the heat.
People in Canada plant gardens.
40 above:
Italian cars won't start.
Canadians drive with the windows down.
32 above:
Distilled water freezes.
The Saskatchewan River water gets thicker.
20 above:
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
Canadians have the last cook-out before it gets cold.
15 above:
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
Canadians throw on a sweatshirt.
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Californians fly away to Mexico.
People in Canada lick the flagpole.
20 below:
People in Miami cease to exist.
Canadians get out their winter coats.
40 below:
Hollywood disintegrates.
Canada's Girl Scouts begin selling cookies door to door.
60 below:
Polar bears begin to evacuate Antarctica.
Canadian Boy Scouts postpone "Winter Survival" classes until it gets more...

A Texan, a Californian, and a Nevadan were out riding their horses.
The Texan pulled out an expensive bottle of whiskey, took a long draught, then another, and then suddenly threw it into the air, pulled out his gun and shot the bottle in midair.
The Californian looked at the Texan and said, "What are you doing? That was a perfectly good bottle of whiskey!! The Texan replied, "In Texas, there`s plenty of whiskey and bottles are cheap.
A while later, not wanted to be outdone, the Californian pulled out a bottle of champagne, took a few sips, threw the half full champagne bottle into the air, pulled out his gun, and shot it in midair.
The Nevadan couldn`t believe this and said "What the heck did you that for? That was an expensive bottle of champagne!! The Californian replied, "In California there is plenty of champagne and bottles are cheap."
A while later, the Nevadan pulled out a bottle of Sierra Nevada Pale Ale. He opened it, took a more...

Q: How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Eleven. One to change it and ten to follow the trend.

Q: How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Five - one to screw it in and four to sit in the hot tub and discuss the environmental impact.

Q: How many Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Six. One to screw it in, one for support, and four to share the experience. This joke was once overheard being told by a lecturer to a class of students during a lecture, in order to make a point about the fact that only one student was doing any work at the terminal while a whole bunch had crowded round to watch - sharing the experience of him doing the work.