Conservative Jokes / Recent Jokes
Doctors have ruled out a possible heart attack--they thoroughly examined Limbaugh and could find no heart..
How do you tell the difference between a liberal and a conservative?
Easy. Watch a man drowning fifty feet offshore.
The conservative will throw out 25 feet of rope and shout "swim for it!"
The liberal will toss out 50 feet of rope, drop his own end, and
go off to do another good deed.
Q: Whats a conservative? A: A liberal who made it through adolescence.
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours. - Milton Berle
A committee is twelve men doing the work of one.
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually. - Abba Eban
A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time.
A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who has never learned to walk. - Franklin D. Roosevelt
A consultant is an ordinary person a long way from home.
A coup that is known in advance is a coup that does not take place.
A couple of months in the lab can often save a couple of hours in the library.
A crisis is when you cannot say "let`s just forget the whole thing."
Rush Limbaugh was treated and released from an area hospital after complaining of pain. Doctors could find nothing wrong with the talk show host except for some minor back spasms, mild dehydration, and the fact that he is alive.
A committee is a group that keeps minutes and loses hours. -
Milton Berle
A committee is twelve men doing the work of one.
A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually. - Abba Eban
A conservative is a man who believes that nothing should be done for the first time.
A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who has never learned to walk. - Franklin D. Roosevelt
A consultant is an ordinary person a long way from home.
A coup that is known in advance is a coup that does not take place.
A couple of months in the lab can often save a couple of hours in the library.
A crisis is when you cannot say “let’s just forget the whole thing. ”
Q: How many Conservative economists does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None, because, look! It's getting brighter! It's definitely getting brighter!