Diaphragm Jokes

we all know how cinderella wanted to go to the ball but her wicked stepmother
wouldnt let her and then the fairy godmother pops up and gives cinderella
some good news: the fairy godmother tells cinderella that she will provide for her
everything she needs to go to the ball but only on 2 conditions. cinderella
asks what she needs to do and fairy godmother replies, "first yo must wear a
diaphragm" cinderella's mouth drops open and says, "you must be crazy!
im on the pill and i dont need to wear a diaphragm" the fairy godmother
reminds cinderella about all the handsome princes that will be attending the ball
that night and cinderella agrees to wear a diphragm. "well what's the second condition?"
the fairy godmother replies "you must be back home at 2AM" well cinderella
explains that if she is gonna party with the princes she wants to be out all
night long. the fairy godmother tells cinderella more...

Cinderella wanted desperately to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother refused to allow her to go.
As Cinderella sat crying in the garden, her Fairy Godmother appeared and promised to provide her with everything she needed to go to the ball, but only on two conditions.
"First," said the Fairy Godmother, "you must agree to wear a diaphragm." Cinderella agreed and asked what the second condition was.
"You must be home by midnight. Any later and your diaphram will turn into a pumpkin," the Godmother said. Cinderella agreed that she would be home on time.
The appointed hour came and went and Cinderella wasn't home. Finally, at 3:00 am, Cinderella arrived home looking love struck and very 'satisfied'.
"Where have you been?" demanded the Godmother. "Your diaphragm was supposed to turn into a pumpkin three hours ago!"
"I met a Prince, Fairy Godmother. He took care of everything," replied a beaming more...

Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her. As
Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother appears, and promises
to provide Cinderella with everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on
two conditions.
"First, you must wear a diaphragm."
Cinderella agrees. "What's the second condition?"
"You must be home by 2 a.m. Any later, and your diaphragm will turn into a
pumpkin."
Cinderella agrees to be home by 2. The appointed hour comes and goes, and
Cinderella doesn't show up. Finally, at 5 a.m., Cinderella shows up, looking
love-struck and very satisfied.
"Where have you been?" demands the fairy godmother, "Your diaphragm was supposed
to turn into a pumpkin three hours ago!"
"I met a prince, Fairy Godmother. He took care of everything."
"I know of no prince with that kind of power! What was his name?"
"I more...

Big Bad Wolf:
The big bad wolf said to Little Red Riding Hood, "unbutton your blouse and let me suck your tits." "Fuck off," she replied as she tugged down her panties. "Eat me, like the fuckin' book says."
Pinocchio:
Pinocchio was fed up with the recent complaints from his wife. "Every time we make love, I get splinters."
So Pinocchio went back to his maker, Gepetto the Carpenter, for advice. "Sandpaper," said the carpenter, "that's what you need." Pinocchio took the sandpaper home. A few weeks later, the carpenter bumped into Pinocchio again.
"How are you getting along with the girls now?" "Who needs girls?" replied Pinocchio.
Cinderella:
Cinderella wants to go to the ball, but her wicked stepmother won't let her. As Cinderella sits crying in the garden, her fairy godmother appears, and promises to provide Cinderella with everything she needs to go to the ball, but only on two more...

A businessman and his secretary, overcome by passion, go to his house for an early afternoon quickie. "Don't worry," he assures her, "my wife is out of town on a business trip, so there's no risk." As one thing leads to another, the woman reaches into her purse and suddenly gasps, "We have to stop! I forgot to bring birth control!" "No problem," he replies, "I'll get my wife's diaphragm." After a few minutes of searching, he returns to the bedroom in a fury. "That witch!" he exclaims. "She took it with her! I always knew she didn't trust me!"