Freezes Jokes / Recent Jokes
60° F:
Southern Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in New England sunbathe.50° F:
New Yorkers try to turn on the heat.
People in New England plant gardens.40° F:
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in New England drive with the windows down.32° F:
Distilled water freezes.
Maine's Moose head Lake's water gets thicker.20° F:
Floridians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in New England throw on a flannel shirt.15° F:
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in New England have the last cookout before it gets cold.0° F:
All the people in Miami die.
New Englanders close the windows.10° below zero:
Californians fly away to Mexico.
The Girl Scouts in New England are selling cookies door to door.25° below zero:
Hollywood disintegrates.
People in New England get out their winter coats.40° below zero:
Washington DC runs out of hot more...
An annotated thermometer
60 Californians put on sweaters
(if they can find one in their wardrobe)
50 Miami residents turn on the heat
Wisconsinites plant gardens
40 You can see your breath
Californians shiver uncontrollably
Minnesotans go swimming
35 Italian cars don't start
32 Water freezes
30 You plan your vacation to Australia
Minnesotans put on T-shirts
Politicians begin to worry about the homeless
Minnesota ice cream sales peak
British cars don't start
25 Boston water freezes
Californians weep pitiably
Minnesotans eat ice cream
Canadians go swimming
20 You can hear your breath
Politicians begin to talk about the homeless
New York City water freezes
Miami residents plan vacation further South
15 French cars don't start
You plan a vacation in Mexico
Cat insists on sleeping in your bed with you
10 Too cold to ski
Snow removal becomes political controversy in Chicago
You more...
Temperature in Fahrenheit:
+60 Californians put on sweaters.
+50 Miami residents turn on the heat.
+45 Vermont residents go to outdoor concert.
+40 You can see your breath.
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
Minnesotans go swimming.
+35 Italians cars don't start.
+32 Water freezes.
+30 You plan your vacation in Australia.
+25 Ohio water freezes.
Californians weep pitiably
Minnesotans eat ice cream.
Canadians go swimming.
+20 Politicians begin to talk about the homeless.
New York City water freezes.
Miami residents plan vacation further south.
+15 French cars don't start.
Cat insists on sleeping with you.
+10 You need jumper cables to get the car going.
+ 5 American cars don't start.
0 Alaskans put on T-shirts.
-10 German cars don't start.
Eyes freeze shut when you blink.
-15 You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo.
Arkansans stick tongues on metal objects.
Miami more...
Temperatures and What They Mean 40 Californians shiver uncontrollably, Minnesotans go swimming. 35 Italian cars don't start. 32 Water freezes. 30 You can see your breath. Politicians begin to worry about the Homeless. 25 Boston water freezes. Cat insists on sleeping on your bed with you. 20 Californians weep pitiably, Minnesotans eat ice cream. You can hear your breath. 15 N.Y. City water freezes. Politicians begin to talk aobut the homeless. 12 You plan a vacation to Mexico. 10 Too cold to snow 5 You need jumper cables to get the car going. Cat insists on sleeping in your bed with you. 3 You plan a vacation in Houston. 0 Too cold to skate. American cars don't start. -5 You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo. -10 Too cold to think. Politicians actually do something about the homeless. -15 Cat insists on sleeping in your pajamas with you. You need jumper cables to get the driver going. -20 You plan a 2-week hot bath. -25 The mighty Monongahela freezes. Japanese cars don't more...
Temperatures
60 degrees - Californians put their sweaters on. 50 degrees - Miami residents turn on the heat. 45 degrees - Vermont residents go to outdoor concert. 40 degrees - You can see your breath, Californians shiver uncontrollably, Minnesotans go swimming. 35 degrees - Italians cars don't start. 32 degrees - Water freezes. 30 degrees - You plan your vacation in Australia. 25 degrees - Ohio water freezes, Californians weep pitiably, Minnesotans eat ice cream, Canadians go swimming. 20 degrees - Politicians begin to talk about the homeless, New York City water freezes, Miami residents plan vacation farther south. 15 degrees - French cars don't start, cat insists on sleeping in your bed with you. 10 degrees - You need jumper cables to get the car going. 5 degrees - American cars don't start. 0 degrees - Alaskans put on T-shirts. -10 degrees - German cars don't start, eyes freeze shut when you step outside. -15 degrees - You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo, more...
Temperatures60 degrees - Californians put their sweaters on. 50 degrees - Miami residents turn on the heat. 45 degrees - Vermont residents go to outdoor concert. 40 degrees - You can see your breath, Californians shiver uncontrollably, Minnesotans go swimming. 35 degrees - Italians cars don't start. 32 degrees - Water freezes. 30 degrees - You plan your vacation in Australia. 25 degrees - Ohio water freezes, Californians weep pitiably, Minnesotans eat ice cream, Canadians go swimming. 20 degrees - Politicians begin to talk about the homeless, New York City water freezes, Miami residents plan vacation farther south. 15 degrees - French cars don't start, cat insists on sleeping in your bed with you. 10 degrees - You need jumper cables to get the car going. 5 degrees - American cars don't start. 0 degrees - Alaskans put on T-shirts. -10 degrees - German cars don't start, eyes freeze shut when you step outside. -15 degrees - You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo, Arkansans more...
Water freezes at 32 degrees and boils at 212 degrees.
There are 180 degrees between freezing and boiling
because there are 180 degrees between north and south.