Hillbillies Jokes

Ballad of the Bobbitt Hillbillies! Sung to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies: Here's a little story of a man named John A poor ex-marine with a little fraction gone It seems one night after gettin' with the wife She lopped off his schlong with a swipe of a knife Pecker that is, Rodeoed, fillet foodWell, the next thing you know there's a ginsu by his side And Lorena's in the car taking willie for a ride She soon got tired of her purple headed friend And tossed him out the window as she rounded the bend Curve, that is Pricker shrubs, wheel hubsShe went to the cops and confessed to the attack And they called out the hounds just to get his weenie back They sniffed and they barked, then they pointed "over there" To John Wayne's henry that was wavin' in the air Found, that is By a fence, evidenceNow peter and John couldn't stay apart too long So a d***-doc said "Hey, I can fix your d**g!" A needle and a thread's just the thing you're gonna need Then the world held it's more...

An African hunter wandered into a cannibal village and saw a menu quoting price of $5 for Italians, $10 for Irishmen, $15 for Germans, $20 for Frenchmen and $100 for hillbillies.
The hunter told the cannibal chief prices were way too high for hillbillies.
"Oh yeah," said the chief, "you ever try to clean one of them?"

Ballad of the Bobbitt Hillbillies! Sung to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies:

Here's a little story of a man named John A poor ex-marine with a little fraction gone It seems one night after gettin' with the wife She lopped off his schlong with a swipe of a knife Pecker that is, Rodeoed, fillet food

Well, the next thing you know there's a ginsu by his side And Lorena's in the car taking willie for a ride She soon got tired of her purple headed friend And tossed him out the window as she rounded the bend Curve, that is Pricker shrubs, wheel hubs

She went to the cops and confessed to the attack And they called out the hounds just to get his weenie back They sniffed and they barked, then they pointed "over there" To John Wayne's henry that was wavin' in the air Found, that is By a fence, evidence

Now peter and John couldn't stay apart too long So a d***-doc said "Hey, I can fix your d**g!" A needle and a thread's just the more...

An African hunter wandered into a cannibal village and saw a menu quoting price of $5 for Italians, $10 for Irishmen, $15 for Germans, $20 for Frenchmen and $100 for hillbillies.
The hunter told the cannibal chief prices were way too high for hillbillies.
"Oh yeah," said the chief, "you ever try to clean one of them?"

Ballad of the Bobbitt Hillbillies! Sung to the tune of the Beverly Hillbillies:
Here's a little story of a man named John A poor ex-marine with a little fraction gone It seems one night after gettin' with the wife She lopped off his schlong with a swipe of a knife Pecker that is, Rodeoed, fillet food
Well, the next thing you know there's a ginsu by his side And Lorena's in the car taking willie for a ride She soon got tired of her purple headed friend And tossed him out the window as she rounded the bend Curve, that is Pricker shrubs, wheel hubs
She went to the cops and confessed to the attack And they called out the hounds just to get his weenie back They sniffed and they barked, then they pointed "over there" To John Wayne's henry that was wavin' in the air Found, that is By a fence, evidence
Now peter and John couldn't stay apart too long So a d***-doc said "Hey, I can fix your d**g!" A needle and a thread's just the thing you're gonna need Then more...