Hockey Jokes / Recent Jokes

· Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad.
· Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when abroad.
· Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.
· Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.
· Aussies: Believe you should look out for your mates.
· Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong to your club.
· Americans: Believe that people should look out for & take care of themselves.
· Canadians: Believe that that's the government's job.
· Aussies: Are extremely patriotic to their beer.
· Americans: Are flag-waving, anthem singing, and obsessively patriotic to the point of blindness.
· Canadians: Can't agree on the words to their anthem, when they can be bothered to sing them.
· Brits: Do not sing at all but prefer a large brass band to perform the anthem.
· Aussies: Export all their crappy programs, which no-one more...

Aussies: Believe you should look out for your mates. Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong to your club. Americans: Believe that people should look out for and take care of themselves. Canadians: Believe that that's the government's job.
---
Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad. Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when abroad. Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad. Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.
---
Americans: Spend most of their lives glued to the idiot box. Canadians: Don't, but only because they can't get more American channels. Brits: Pay a tax just so they can watch 5 channels. Aussies: Export all their crappy programs, which no one there watches, to Britain, where everybody loves them.
---
Americans: Love to watch sports on the idiot box. Brits: Love to watch sports in stadiums so they can fight with other more...

The world's most avid hockey fan, a beautiful sardarni, had arrived early at the stadium for the first game of the series between local rival teams only to realize that she had left her ticket at home.

Not wanting to miss any of the match, she went to the ticket booth and got in a long line for another seat. After an hour's wait she was just a few feet from the booth when a voice called out,' Hey, Jasmeet!'

She looked up, stepped out of line and tried to find the owner of the voice - with no success. Then she realized she had lost her place in the line, and had to go back to the end of the line and wait all over again. Just as she got to the window, a voice called out,' Hey, jasmeet!' Again she tried to find the voice and got out of line as she wandered looking for the owner of the voice.

But no luck. She was very upset as she got back in line for her ticket.

Finally she had her ticket and took her seat eager for the game to begin. As she more...

The world's most avid hockey fan, a beautiful sardarni, had arrived early at the stadium for the first game of the series between local rival teams only to realize that she had left her ticket at home. Not wanting to miss any of the match, she went to the ticket booth and got in a long line for another seat. After an hour's wait she was just a few feet from the booth when a voice called out,' Hey, Jasmeet!' She looked up, stepped out of line and tried to find the owner of the voice - with no success. Then she realized she had lost her place in the line, and had to go back to the end of the line and wait all over again. Just as she got to the window, a voice called out,' Hey, jasmeet!' Again she tried to find the voice and got out of line as she wandered looking for the owner of the voice. But no luck. She was very upset as she got back in line for her ticket. Finally she had her ticket and took her seat eager for the game to begin. As she waited for it to start, she heard the voice more...

· Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad.
· Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when abroad.
· Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.
· Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.
· Aussies: Believe you should look out for your mates.
· Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong to your club.
· Americans: Believe that people should look out for & take care of themselves.
· Canadians: Believe that that's the government's job.
· Aussies: Are extremely patriotic to their beer.
· Americans: Are flag-waving, anthem singing, and obsessively patriotic to the point of blindness.
· Canadians: Can't agree on the words to their anthem, when they can be bothered to sing them.
· Brits: Do not sing at all but prefer a large brass band to perform the anthem.
· Aussies: Export all their crappy programs, which no-one more...

The Detroit Red Wings are back in the Stanley Cup Finals. When asked what they thought of being in the Super Bowl of hockey, all of Detroit responded, "What's the Super Bowl?"

Aussies: Believe you should look out for your mates.
Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong to your club.
Americans: Believe that people should look out for and take care of themselves.
Canadians: Believe that that's the government's job.
Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad.
Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when abroad.
Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.
Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.
Americans: Spend most of their lives glued to the idiot box.
Canadians: Don't, but only because they can't get more American channels.
Brits: Pay a tax just so they can watch 4 channels.
Aussies: Export all their crappy programs, which no one there watches, to Britain, where everybody loves them.
Americans: Love to watch sports on the idiot box.
Brits: Love to watch sports in stadiums so they more...