Hugs Jokes

Whats big and purple and hugs your Easter basket? The Easter Barney!

What's big and purple and hugs your Easter basket? The Easter Barney!

John and Mary visit their pastor for marriage counseling. The pastor gets up and hugs Mary, and sits down. He gets up and hugs Mary a second, and third time, and then turns to John and says, "See that, John. Mary needs that EVERY DAY!"John replies, "Well, that's fine, Pastor. But I can't bring her over hereexcept on Tuesdays and Thursdays."

In the News:

The Free Hugs campaign, which started in Australia and is aimed at cheering up strangers by hugging them on the street, is not going over too well in China, with some huggers even being hauled away to jail – where cellmates tend to encourage hugs.

A Mississippi woman let her husband, an avid sports fan, pick the name for their newborn son. He named the boy ESPN but the other kids will probably call him ESPenis, LeSPN, and Loser-I’m-Gonna-Kick-Your-Butt-at-RecessPN.

The mayor of Gallatin, Tennessee claims he didn’t know, when he allowed filmmakers to use his office to shoot "Thong Girl 3," that the movie was about a super-heroine who gets her powers from her red thong. Citizens are outraged and rightly so. Every decent politician knows his porn.

A Washington state man was charged with bestiality after his wife found him on the back porch having intercourse with their female pit bull terrier. He faces up to five years in more...

Ingredients 1/2 cup Hugs 4 tsp Kisses 2 cups Smiles 4 cups Love 1 cup Special Holiday Cheer 1/2 cup Peace on Earth 3 tsp Christmas Spirit 2 cups Goodwill Toward Man 1 Sprig of Mistletoe 1 medium-size bag of Christmas Snowflakes (the regular kind won't do!)
Method
Mix Hugs, Kisses, Smiles and Love until consistent. Blend in Holiday Cheer, Peace on Earth, Christmas Spirit and the Good Will toward Men. Use the mixture to fill a large, warm heart, where it can be stored for a lifetime. (It never goes bad!)
Serve as desired under mistletoe, sprinkled liberally with special Christmas Snowflakes.
It is especially good when accompanied by Christmas Carols and family get-togethers.
Serve to one and all.