Jingle Jokes / Recent Jokes

Schizophrenia: Do You Hear What I Hear?

Multiple Personality: We Three Kings

Disoriented Are. Dementia: I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas.

Narcissistic: Hark The Herald Angels Sing (About Me)

Mania: Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town or Deck the Halls and Spare No Expense!

Paranoia: Santa Claus is Coming To Get Me.

Personality Disorder: You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, then MAYBE I'll tell you why.

Obsessive Compulsive: Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell...

Borderline Personality: Thoughts of Roasting in more...

Two men were boasting to each other about their old army days.

"Why, my outfit was so well drilled," declared one, "that when they presented arms all you could hear was slap, slap, click."

"Very good," conceded the other, "but when my company presented arms you'd just hear slap, slap, jingle."

"What was the jingle?" asked the first. "Oh," replied the other offhand, "just our medals."

Schizophrenia - Do You Hear What I Hear?

Multiple Personality Disorder - We Three Kings Disoriented Are

Dementia - I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas

Narcissistic - Hark The Herald Angels Sing About Me

Manic - Deck The Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Offices and
towns and Cars and Buses and Trucks and Trees and Fire Hydrants and...

Paranoid - Santa Claus Is Coming To Get Me

Borderline Personality - Thoughts Of Roasting On An Open Fire

Personality Disorder - You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, Maybe I'll Tell You Why

Obsessive Compulsive - Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle, Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells..............

Yesterday I visited a translation website and translated some Christmas
carols into other languages, then back into English. The results as follows:

Jingleglocken, jingleglocken, jingle completely.
Oh which fun it is to ride into a horse-opened sleigh.
("Jingle Bells, translated into German and then back into English)

Ring of sleighbells, are you listening?
In the track the snow is shining.
A beautiful vista, we are tonight happy,
Walking in the country of the wonders of the winter.
("Winter Wonderland, Spanish)

Icily Snowman a lucky merry soul
With one was formed from a key corncob,
And the nose and two eyes, those from coal.
("Frosty the Snowman, German)

Rudolph the red-nose reindeer has had a nose a lot polishes,
And if you never saw it, you would even say that she emits light.
("Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Italian)

You would improve the clock more...

Two men were boasting to each other about their old army
days. "Why, my outfit was so well drilled," declared one, "that
when they presented arms all you could hear was slap, slap,
click."
"Very good," conceded the other, "but when my company
presented arms you'd just hear slap, slap, jingle."
"What was the jingle?" asked the first.
"Oh," replied the other off hand, "just our medals."

Psychological Christmas SongsSCHIZOPHRENIA - Do You Hear What I Hear? MULTIPLE PERSONALITY - We Three Kings Disoriented Are. DEMENTIA - I Think I'll Be Home For Christmas. NARCISSISTIC - Hark The Herald Angels Sing (About Me)MANIA - Deck the Halls and Walls and House and Lawn and Streets and Stores and Office and Town. .. or Deck the Halls and Spare No Expense! PARANOIA - Santa Claus is Coming To Get Me. PERSONALITY DISORDER - You Better Watch Out, I'm Gonna Cry, I'm Gonna Pout, then MAYBE I'll tell you why. OBSESSIVE COMPULSIVE - Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell, Jingle Bell Rock, Jingle Bell.... BORDERLINE PERSONALITY - Thoughts of Roasting in an Open Fire. PASSIVE AGGRESSIVE - On the more...

Chorus
Jingle bells, Shopping bells, jingle all the way,
Oh, what fun it is to go shopping everyday.
Candy store, five and ten, sports shop after that,
Toys for all the kiddies and don’t forget the cat.
Dashing thru the crowds, people everywhere,
Up and down the aisles, sneezing in my hair.
There’s so much to choose, there’s so much to see.
Wonder if what I got you cost more’n what you got me.
Chorus
Shopping Bells, Jingle Bells, will they never stop,
I’ve been shopping all week long and I’m about to drop.
Ring them bells somewhere else far away from here,
Ain’t it really lucky Christmas comes but once a year?
Verse
Wrap your presents nice, Pretty bows that shine,
Take them out to mail, You’re gonna wait in line.
Find your way back home, and if you’re like me,
Maybe on the twenty-fourth, You’ll get to trim the tree.
Chorus
Jingle Bells, Shopping Bells, Jingle dear more...