Moose Jokes / Recent Jokes

Dumb Alaska laws and humor, relating to many aspects of the state, its weather, and its people.

Alaska Crazy Law Alaska's More Important Laws

In Fairbanks it is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose.

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While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited.

It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane.

It is the state policy that emergencies are held to a minimum and are rarely found to exist.-Sec. 44. 62. 270. State policy.

Moose may not be viewed from an airplane.

& Q. How can you tell if a plane is full of flute players?
A. When the engines stop, the whining continues
&
Q: How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: None. They have a machine that does that now.
Q: What do you call someone who hangs around a bunch of musicians?
A: A drummer.
Q: How do you know if there is a drummer at your door?
A: The knocking always speeds up.
Q: Why do drummers always have trouble entering a room?
A: They never know when to come in.
Q: How many lead trumpet players does it take to change a light buld?
A: 50. 1 to do it and the others to stand around and say, "I could do that
better.
Q: What do lead trumpet players use for birth control?
A: Their personality.
Q: How do lead trumpet players greet each other?
A: "Hi, I`m better than you."
Q: What`s the inscription on dead blues-singers tombstones?
A: "I didn`t wake up this more...

Adrian: I'll never go moose hunting again.Duane: Why? Was the gun too heavy? Adrian: I didn't mind carrying the big gun, but the 200-pound decoy was a real drag.

Moose may not be viewed from an airplane. It is considered an offense to push a live moose out of a moving airplane. While it is legal to shoot bears, waking a sleeping bear for the purpose of taking a photograph is prohibited. State policy states that emergencies are held to a minimum and rarely found to exist. Kangaroos are not allowed in barber shops at any time. In Alaska it is illegal to whisper in someone's ear while they are moose hunting. Fairbanks: It is considered an offense to feed alcoholic beverages to a moose.Fairbanks: A law in Fairbanks does not allow moose to have sex on city streets.

There are two moose hunters who hop
on a float-plane and fly to their
destination. When the plane arrives at the
lake, the pilot says: "In three days, I'll
meet you two guys back here with one
moose." The plane flew away and the
men set up camp.
The first day they shot nothing. The
second, one man shot a moose and on
the third day, the second man shot
another moose. The plane came to pick
them up, and the pilot said: "What are you
doing, I told you to be here with only one
moose, not two." The hunters told the
pilot that last year, the pilot let them take
two mooses (mice?). The pilot wanted to
stay competitive with the other pilots and
made an exception this time to let the
hunters take two mooses. With the extra
weight, the plane barely got off the lake,
then hit a tree and crashed. One hunter
crawled over to his buddy to see if he was
hurt. He shook him, then he woke up more...

An engineer, a physicist, and a statistician were moose hunting in northern Canada. After a short
walk through the marshes they spotted a HUGE moose 150 meters away.
The engineer raised his gun and fired at the moose. A puff of dust showed that the bullet landed 3
meters to the right of the moose.
The physicist, realizing that there was a substantial breeze that the engineer did not account for,
aimed to the left of the moose and fired. The bullet landed 3 meters to the left of the moose.
The statistician jumped up and down and screamed "We got him! We got him!"

Q) How did the moose keep his antlers from being stolen?
A) He locked horns with another moose.
Q) Why wouldn't the leopard take a bath?
A) He didn't want to get spotlessly clean.
Q) What do skunks do when they get angry?
A) They raise a stink.
Q) What do you call a well-dressed lion?
A) A dandy lion (dandelion).
Q) What do you call a vaccination given to a boy deer?
A) Buck shot.
Q) Why didn't the elephant get rich?
A) He was willing to work for peanuts.
Q) How did the kangaroo convict escape?
A) He jumped bail.
Q) What did the judge say when a skunk walked in?
A) Odor (order) in the court.
Q) What did the mole publisher print?
A) An underground newspaper.
Q) Why was the little elephant six hours late for dinner?
A) He had to wash behind his ears before coming to the table.