Nevada Jokes / Recent Jokes

According to the Associated Press, "Many people from other countries are flocking to the United States, to Las Vegas in most cases, to choose the sex of their babies. Well-off foreign couples are getting around laws banning sex selection in their home countries by coming to American soil, where it's legal, for medical procedures that can give them a boy or girl, if they want". The Chinese want boys, the Canadians want girls, and the Israelis want to win big.

Breaking News... Britney Spears has married OJ Simpson. Commenting on the wedding, Britney thinks the stability of being married again will help influence the judges decision to prove once and for all she is serious about raising her kids in a stable environment. OJ had no comment on the wedding, but smiled and said "What goes on in Vegas stays in Vegas".

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Nevada!
Nevada who?
Nevada saw you look so bad, you should be bed!

Las Vegas has made it a crime to give food to a homeless person. "They will only spend the calories on energy," explained the mayor.

The Stardust Casino came crashing down at 2:33 AM yesterday, just three hours before the rest of Las Vegas.

Wayne Gretzky believes that Las Vegas will have an NHL team within five years. And his wife is willing to put 10 grand on it.

Albert Garcia Jr. sued the state in 1992 because the Ely State Prison began delivering his legal mail from 9 p.m. to 10 p.m. He claimed the delivery time interfered with his sleeping pattern.
Kenneth Parker sued the state because he ordered two jars of chunky peanut butter from the prison canteen at Nevada State Prison in 1989 but received one jar of chunky and one jar of creamy peanut butter. While Parker was later given the peanut butter he requested, he still pursued the case, and it was later dismissed.
Randall Wildeman sued the state in 1991 because a Nevada State Prison officer destroyed the bras and bikini panties he had in his cell. Wildeman claimed he was making women's clothing to be sent as gifts.
Michael Sims sued the state in 1994 on the grounds that a prison guard at the Ely State Prison was calling him names. Sims said the guard called him a "faggot" and a "snitch" and put him in a life-threatening situation.
Donald Ferris sued Nevada more...