Olympics Jokes / Recent Jokes

Does it seem strange to you that the Olympics, the oldest and most famous sporting event, is the one televised event that the competitors don't get cash. In fact, if you have ever made any money at all of your sport, you are disqualified. Its like, you win a gold medal and your like "So, what's my reward?" and they're like "this nice shiny medal." "you mean I don't get any money at all?" "no we frown upon that." "so I wasted a week of my life for nothing?" "but you get this shiny medal" "but-" "SHINY!" I tell you that medal would be on e-bay so fast. And did you ever notice how they have a count of what countries have the most medals? The U.S. always wins but then again, we're like 49 countries for the price of 1. Wyoming doesn't count towards our athletes because lets face it, smoky bears not gettin' any younger. You know, the Olympics always managed to keep the old traditions alive like lighting the more...

The athlete is now set to appear on a box of "Weedies" cereal.

NBC aired a private conversation between Gold medalist Shaun White and his coach at the Olympics that included foul language. NBC has apologized, saying, "We f__ked up."

A British newspaper published a photo of Michael Phelps inhaling from a marijuana pipe. Phelps says he only took one hit, but he held it for three minutes.

...Rod Blagojevich has said that if Chicago is awarded the 2016 Olympics, that he wants to help out. Blagojevich said he is willing to volunteer his time to help properly run it right into the ground.

Q: What's better than winning 4 gold medals at the special olympics?
A: Not being retarded!

A 103-year-old woman in Beijing, China is training twice a day to carry the torch in the 2008 Beijing Olympics. Experts predict if the 103-year-old leaves now, by the 2008 games she should be at the end of her driveway.