Olympics Jokes / Recent Jokes
Former Olympic canoeing champion Frantisek Capek has died of an unspecified heart problem at the age of 93. Doctors could have saved him if they hadn't tragically reached for the wrong paddles.
Ann Arbor, Michigan- Kolan McConiughey, a mentally disabled man considered one of the nation's top Special Olympics bowlers, has challenged Barack Obama to a bowling match after hearing his controversial comments on The Tonight Show.
But little does he know, even if he beats Obama, they'll still both be winners.
America took an early lead in the Olympic medal count. Unfortunately, Canadian medals are worth 5% less in the states.
Ole and Lena went to the Olympics. While sitting on a bench a lady turned to Ole and said, "Are you a pole vaulter?" Ole said, "No, I'm Norvegian...and my name isn't Valter."
Q: What’s better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics?
A: Not being retarded.
BEIJING, CHINA--After two weeks of remarkable success against the world's finest athletes, the Chinese National Olympic Team was carefully disassembled and put back into storage yesterday, placed in a specially designed, high-tech cryogenic freezing pod for preservation until the 2000 Olympics in Sydney, Australia. "You have brought great honor to your nation," said Chinese Prime Minister Deng Xiaoping during a ceremony before more than 800, 000 in Beijing's Tiananmen Square. "Now we must remove your sculpted limbs from your muscular torsos and return you to your sarcophagi so that you may achieve even greater glories for the People's Republic in the future." Amid great cheers from the crowd, Deng then pulled a switch, lowering the athletes into the $440 million, titanium-reinforced, liquid radon-cooled absolute zero temperature athlete preservation chamber, where they will be preserved in a perfect state of suspended animation until July 2000. The elite 120-member more...
The Winter Olympics are actually getting surprisingly high ratings for NBC. The ratings are so high, NBC is thinking of replacing them.