Pupil Jokes / Recent Jokes
Pupil: I don't think I deserved zero on this test! Teacher: I agree, but that's the lowest mark I could give you!
A TEACHER ASKING HER STUDENTS IN CLASS FIVE A QUESTION ON THE TOPIC: WHICH PART OF THE BODY GOES TO HEAVEN FIRST.
TEACHER:WHICH PART OF THE BODY GOES TO HEAVEN FIRST?
PUPIL: THE FEET,
TEACH: WHY
PUPIL: EVERY NITE I SEE MY MUM WITH HER FEET UP AND SAYING OH! GOD AM COMING.
The Grade 2 pupils returned to class after the long weekend. Their teacher told them to tell their classmates about the most exciting thing they did during the weekend, but to use adult words in telling their stories. First Pupil: "I visited my Nana." Teacher: "Please use adult words, you visited your Grandmother." Second Pupil: I had a ride on a choo-choo." Teacher: "Please, you had a ride on a train." Third Pupil: I read a whole book by myself for the first time." Teacher: "Excellent. And what was the name of the book?" Third Pupil, with a big grin: "Winnie The Shit!"
Teacher: Ill call you Fred Smith then. Pupil: My dad wont like that. Teacher: Why is that? Pupil: He doesnt like people taking the Mickey out of my name!
A kindergarten pupil told his teacher he`d found a cat, but it was dead. "How do you know that the cat was dead?" she asked her pupil.
"Because I pissed in its ear and it didn`t move," answered the child innocently.
"You did WHAT?!? " the teacher exclaimed in surprise.
"You know," explained the boy, "I leaned over and went ˜Pssst!` and it didn`t move."
Teacher: Whats 2 and 2? Pupil: 4Teacher: Thats good. Pupil: Good?, thats perfect!
The Grade 2 pupils returned to class after the long weekend. Their teacher told them to tell their classmates about the most exciting thing they did during the weekend, but to use adult words in telling their stories.
First Pupil: "I visited my Nana."
Teacher: "Please use adult words, you visited your Grandmother."
Second Pupil: I had a ride on a choo-choo."
Teacher: "Please, you had a ride on a train."
Third Pupil: I read a whole book by myself for the first time."
Teacher: "Excellent. And what was the name of the book?"
Third Pupil, with a big grin: "Winnie The Shit!"