Reader Jokes / Recent Jokes

Review: The Cat in the Hat by Dr. Seuss, 61 pages. Beginner Books, $3.95 The Cat in the Hat is a hard-hitting novel of prose and poetryin which the author re-examines the dynamic rhyming schemes andbold imagery of some of his earlier works, most notably GreenEggs and Ham, If I Ran the Zoo, and Why Can't I Shower WithMommy? In this novel, Theodore Geisel, writing under thepseudonym Dr. Seuss, pays homage to the great Dr. Sigmund Freudin a nightmarish fantasy of a renegade feline helping two youngchildren understand their own frustrated sexuality.The story opens with two youngsters, a brother and a sister, abandoned by their mother, staring mournfully through thewindow of their single-family dwelling. In the foreground, alarge tree/phallic symbol dances wildly in the wind, tauntingthe children and encouraging them to succumb to the sexualyearnings they undoubtedly feel for each other. Even to themost unlearned reader, the blatant references to theincestuous relationship the two share more...

Acheson`s Rule Of The Bureaucracy: A memorandum is written not to inform the reader, but to protect the writer. - Dean Acheson
Action`s Law: Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely.
Adler`s Distinction: Language is all that separates us from the lower animals, and from the bureaucrats.
Advertising Rule: In writing a patent-medicine advertisement, first convince the reader that he has the disease he is reading about; secondly, that it is curable.
Air Force Inertia Axiom: Consistency is always easier to defend than correctness.
Allen`s Distinction: The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won`t get much sleep. - Woody Allen
Albrecht`s Law: Social innovations tend to the level of minimum tolerable well-being.
Alden`s Laws: (1) Giving away baby clothes and furniture is the major cause of pregnancy. (2) Always be backlit. (3) Sit down whenever possible.
Andrea`s Admonition: Never bestow profanity upon a driver who more...

If you're not a good reader.. he can't read
If you're a good reader.. why?.. some of the best players couldn't read
If you like to dress up and look neat.. who does he think he is?
If you don't look neat.. he's still a hippie
If you grow a beard.. what's he hiding?
If you're clean shaven.. he doesn't look like a jazz musician
Finally
You introduce yourself as a jazz guitarist. ..
Oh God! Not another guitar player!

Mind reader
My cousin Moishe owned one of the biggest and fastest-growing businesses in North West London, a furniture store.
I convinced him that he needed to take a trip to Italy to check out the merchandise himself and because he was still single, he could check out all the hot Italian women, and maybe get lucky.
As Moishe was checking into a hotel, he struck up an acquaintance with a beautiful young lady. She only spoke Italian and he only spoke English, so neither understood a word the other spoke.
He took out a pencil and a notebook and drew a picture of a taxi. She smiled, nodded her head and they went for a ride in the park. Later, he drew a picture of a table in a restaurant with a question mark and she nodded, so they went to dinner. After dinner he sketched two dancers and she was delighted. They went to several nightclubs, drank champagne, danced and had a glorious evening. It had gotten quite late when she motioned for the pencil and drew a picture of more...

Acheson's Rule Of The Bureaucracy: A memorandum is written not to inform the reader, but to protect the writer. - Dean Acheson
Action's Law: Power tends to corrupt; absolute power corrupts absolutely.
Adler's Distinction: Language is all that separates us from the lower animals, and from the bureaucrats.
Advertising Rule: In writing a patent-medicine advertisement, first convince the reader that he has the disease he is reading about; secondly, that it is curable.
Air Force Inertia Axiom: Consistency is always easier to defend than correctness.
Allen's Distinction: The lion and the calf shall lie down together but the calf won't get much sleep. - Woody Allen
Albrecht's Law: Social innovations tend to the level of minimum tolerable well-being.
Alden's Laws: (1) Giving away baby clothes and furniture is the major cause of pregnancy. (2) Always be backlit. (3) Sit down whenever possible.
Andrea's Admonition: Never bestow profanity upon a driver who more...