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A man had just settled into his seat next to the window on the plane when another man sat down in the aisle seat and put his black Labrador Retriever in the middle seat next to the man. The first man looked very quizzically at the dog and asked why the dog was allowed on the plane.


The second man explained that he was a DEA agent and that the dog was a' sniffing dog'. "His name is Sniffer and he's the best there is. I'll show you once we get airborne, when I put him to work." The plane took off, and once it has leveled out, the agent said, "Watch this." He told Sniffer to "search". Sniffer jumped down, walked along the aisle, and finally sat very purposefully next to a woman for several seconds.


Sniffer then returned to his seat and put one paw on the agent's arm. The agent said, "Good boy", and he turned to the man and said, "That woman is in possession of marijuana, so I'm making a note of her seat number more...

This just in from the CNN News Room: Poland’s Worst Air Disaster occurred today when a small two-seater Cessna 152 plane crashed into a cemetery early this afternoon in central Poland. Polish search and rescue workers have recovered 300 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the evening.

Job search
My first job was working in an orange juice factory,
but I got canned. .. couldn`t concentrate. Then I worked in the woods as a lumberjack,
but I just couldn`t hack it … so they gave me the axe. After that I tried to be a tailor,
but I just wasn`t suited for it … mainly because it was a so-so job. Next I tried working in a Quick Fit Centre,
but that was exhausting. I wanted to be a barber,
but I just couldn`t cut it. Then I tried to be a chef,
figured it would add spice to my life, but I just didn`t have the thyme. Finally, I attempted to be a deli worker,
but any way I sliced it, I couldn`t cut the mustard. My best job was being a musician,
but eventually I found I wasn`t noteworthy. I studied a long time to become a doctor,
but I didn`t have any patients. Next was a job in a shoe factory,
I tried but I just didn`t fit in. I became a professional fisherman,
but discovered that I couldn`t live on my net income. more...

A man is sitting on a plane which is about to take off when another man, accompanied by a dog, board it and occupy the seats alongside him.
Noticing the first man looking quizzically at the dog, the dog handler tells him they work for the airline and says, "Don't mind Rocky, he's a sniffer dog. The best there is. Once we get airborne, I'll set him to work and show you what I mean."
The plane takes off and levels out when the handler says, "Ok, watch this. Rocky, Search!"
The dog immediately jumps down from his seat, walks up the aisle and sits down beside a woman for a few seconds. He then returns to his seat and puts one paw on the handler's arm.
"Good boy," the handler says. He then turns to the first man and says, "That woman is in possession of marijuana, so I'm making a note of this, and her seat number, for the police who will apprehend her upon arrival."
"Wow, that's unbelievable," exclaims the first more...

Their new online search tool is named "Bing" and purportedly will be included in all new pc's sold starting next year... Most people, including myself, have been Google users for years now...
So what will be the first thing users type into the search box when this thing automatically opens up on their computers..... "Uninstall Microsoft Bing"...

A dedicated shop steward was at a convention in Las Vegas and decided to check out the local brothels.
When he got to the first one, he asked the madame, "Is this a union house?" "No, I'm sorry it isn't."
"Well, if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"
"The house gets $80 and the girls get $20."
Mightily offended at such unfair dealings, the man stomped off down the street in search of a more equitable shop.
His search continued as long as you want to draw things out, until finally he reached a brothel where the madame said, "Why yes, this is a union house."
"And if I pay you $100, what cut do the girls get?"
"The girls get $80 and the house gets $20."
"That's more like it!" the man said. He looked around the room and pointed to a stunningly attractive redhead. "I'd like her for the night."
"I'm sure you would, sir," said the madame,... more...

ATTENTION ALL MICROSOFT HATERS - I have sorted through my tagline manager and have found all of theMicrosoft bashing taglines I can possibly find. Please have yourself a laugh at Bill Gates expense:
I don't hate Windows - it runs great under OS/2!
"Chicago, Windows 4.0, Windows 95"?!?!?!?
"Mr. Worf, blow the Windows-powered Borg ship out of this Universe!"
#1 OS/2 tip: Drag the Windows folder to the shreader!!!
- Opens new Gates not seen through Windows!
.. Bugs come in through open Windows.
..Windows NT Performance", on the next "In Search Of"
After seeing Windows I realized Bill Gates is an idiot.
Air conditioned environment - Do not open Windows.
Best way to dispose of the Borg: Give them Windows 3.1.
Bugs come in through Open Windows
Chernobyl used Windows
Downgrade your system for only 89 dollars! Install Windows!
Error 15 - Unable to exit Windows. Try the door.
Windows Error #F99 - CPU more...