Taiwan Jokes

The president of Chase Manhattan Bank decides he should take a vacation/business trip. Since the president has heard how much fun Taipei is, he decides to visit the offices there. He books two tickets, one for him and one for his secretary. After his arrival in Taipei, the president receives an urgent message from headquarters that the richest man in Taiwan wants to put all his money into a Chase Manhattan account. Since the account would be quite substantial, the president decides to meet personally with the man. The next day, the president and his secretary go to meet the Taiwanese at an exclusive restaurant. Throughout the dinner, the president tries to bring up the subject of opening the new account but the prospective client only seems interested in the president's secretary. After dinner, the businessman asks the secretary to spend the rest of the evening seeing the sights in Taipei with him. Not wishing to offend the prospective client, the president orders his secretary to go more...

Only the Chinese Communist Party (CCP) can assure economic prosperity. Only the CCP can maintain societal stability. No one wants freedom. All Chinese demand national reunification meaning that the mainland must take over Taiwan. The one child policy works. China is capitalist. The Tiananmen Massacre was necessary in order to prevent chaos. Only the CCP produces people capable of leading the country. Deng Xiaoping intended to implement democracy. 1 country 2 systems works. Mao unified China. Falun Gong wants to destroy China. The CCP opposes corruption. CCP is like the sun. The CCP cares about Chinese. The People's Liberation Army (PLA) has the ability to invade and take over Taiwan. The PLA won the 1979 war with Vietnam. 1 million dead PLA' volunteers' in Korea constituted a victory. The PLA knows how to maintain the modern Russian aircraft and ships that it purchased Zhu Rongji wants to clean up corruption. Mainland corruption is not creeping into Hong Kong. Falun Gong is a more...

Bill Smith started the day early, having set his alarm clock (made in Japan), for 6.00 a.m. While his coffee pot (made in Japan), is perking, he puts his blow dryer (made in Taiwan) to work and shaves with his electric razor (made in Hong Kong). He puts on a dress shirt (made in Taiwan), his designer jeans (made in Singapore), and a pair of tennis shoes (made in Korea).
After cooking up some breakfast in his new electric skillet (made in the Philippines), he sits down to figure out on his calculator (made in Mexico), how much he can spend today. After setting his watch (made in Switzerland), to the radio (made in Hong Kong), he goes out, gets in his car (made in Germany), goes looking as he has been for months, for a good paying American job.
After the end of another discouraging and fruitless day, Bill decides to relax for a while. He puts on a pair of sandals (made in Brazil), pours himself a glass of wine made in France), and turns on his TV (made in Japan), and wonders more...

Time sensitive note: This joke pertains to the crash of a Chinese plane into a United States plane over International waters. China demanded an apology from us and stole technology from our plane when it was forced to make an emergency landing in Chinese lands. Dear China, We're sorry you don't train your fighter pilots better. As a token of our apology, here's a copy of Microsoft Flight Simulator 2000. We're also sorry your front-line fighter planes can't outmaneuver a 35-year old prop-driven airliner. Perhaps you'd like to purchase some surplus 1950's-era Lockheed Starfighters from Taiwan... since they just replaced all theirs with new F-16's. We're also sorry you believe your territorial waters extend all the way to Australia. For future reference, here's an American 6th grade geography textbook. (Please note the Copyright information printed inside the cover.) In addition, we're sorry you can't seem to see your part of this incident. We know it seems easier to blame others than to more...

Question: How many Republic presidential candidates from 2000 did it take to screw in a light bulb? Answer: It doesn't matter whether the bulb is changed or not; it only matters that the new bulb was made in the US of A. Taiwan and South Korea have put up massive barriers to importing US light bulbs; we'll see how they like it when their bulbs cost $10, 000 to screw in here.