Trunk Jokes / Recent Jokes

Jack goes to the doctor and says "Doc I'm having trouble getting mypenis erect, can you help me?" After a complete examination the doctor tells Jack, "Well theproblem with you is that the muscles around the base of your penisare damaged. There's really nothing I can do for you except ifyou're willing to try an experimental treatment." Jack asks sadly, "What is this treatment?" "Well," the doctorexplains, "what we would do is take the muscles from the trunk of ababy elephant and implant them in your penis." Jack thinks about it silently then says, "Well the thought of going through life without ever having sex again is too much, lets go forit." A few weeks after the operation Jack was given the green light touse his improved equipment. He planned a romantic evening for hisgirl friend and took her to one of the nicest restaurants in thecity. In the middle of dinner he felt a stirring between his legsthat continued to the point more...

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver`s license?
Driver: I don`t have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the owner`s card for this vehicle?
Driver: It`s not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That`s right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner`s card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There`s a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That`s where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There`s a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car
was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here more...

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:

Officer: May I see your driver's license?

Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.

Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle?

Driver: It's not my car. I stole it.

Officer: The car is stolen?

Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.

Officer: There's a gun in the glove box?

Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.

Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?

Driver: Yes, sir.

Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:

Captain: Sir, can I see your more...

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:
Officer: May I see your driver's license? Driver: I don't have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI. Officer: May I see the owner's card for this vehicle? Driver: It's not my car. I stole it. Officer: The car is stolen? Driver: That's right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner's card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there. Officer: There's a gun in the glove box? Driver: Yes sir. That's where I put it after shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk. Officer: There's a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!? Driver: Yes, sir. Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation: Captain: Sir, may I see your license? Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid. Captain: Whose car is this? Driver: It's mine, officer. Here's the owner's card. The more...

A police officer pulls a guy over for speeding and has the following exchange:Officer: May I see your driver`s license?Driver: I don`t have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI.Officer: May I see the owner`s card for this vehicle?Driver: It`s not my car. I stole it.Officer: The car is stolen?Driver: That`s right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner`s card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.Officer: There`s a gun in the glove box?Driver: Yes sir. That`s where I put it after shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.Officer: There`s a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?Driver: Yes, sir.Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation:Captain: Sir, may I see your license?Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid.Captain: Whose car is this?Driver: It`s mine, officer. Here`s the owner`s card. The driver owned the more...

The following is supposedly a true story. To be included, besides being true, the story is most likely strange, weird, surprising, or funny. Sunday, December 13, 1992After police pulled over Kevin Temple, 35, in a routine traffic stop in Bronson, Fla., in October, a police dog sniffing the trunk became agitated. In the trunk and back seat, officers found the following live animals: 48 rattlesnakes, a Gila monster, 45 non-poisonous snakes, 67 scorpions, several tarantulas and small lizards, and a parrot. Temple said they were just pets.

At the end of camp, Julie won the prize for neatest trunk. Her mother was amazed.' How did your trunk get so neat?' she asked her messy daughter.' It was easy,' said Julie.' I just never unpacked!'