Vasectomy Jokes / Recent Jokes

After having their 11th child, an Alabama couple decided that was
Enough (they could not afford a larger doublewide). So, the husband went to his doctor (who also treated mules) and told him that he and his wife/cousin didn't want to have any more children.
The doctor told him that there was a procedure called a vasectomy
that could fix the problem. The doctor instructed him to go home, get a
cherry bomb (fireworks are legal in Alabama), light it, put it in a
beer can, then hold the can up to his ear and count to 10.
The Alabamian said to the doctor, "I may not be the smartest man,
but I don't see how putting a cherry bomb in a beer can next to my ear is going to help me."
So, the couple drove to Georgia to get a second opinion. The Georgia
physician was just about to tell them about the procedure for a
vasectomy when he noticed that they were from Alabama. This doctor
instead told the man to go home and get a cherry bomb, light more...

A couple were celebrating the birth of their first child, a son. After the party was over, the husband spoke to his wife:' My dear, I have a very modern outlook on the size of a family. I think one son is good enough for us. So if you don't mind, I would like to undergo a vasectomy. What do you think?'
'Do as you wish,' replied the wife coyly.' You have your vasectomy now, I'll have my hysterectomy after I have had the third child.'

Did you hear about the guy who got his vasectomy done at Sears? -Every time he gets a hard-on, the garage door goes up.

While performing a vasectomy, the doctor slipped and accidentally cut off one of the man's testicles. In order to avoid a huge malpractice suit, the doctor replaced the missing testicle with an onion.
A few weeks later, the man returned to the doctor for a check-up.
"How's your sex life?" asked the doctor.
"Pretty good," the man replied, "but I have been having some strange side effects."
"Such as?" the doctor asked nervously.
"Well, every time I urinate my eyes water," explained the man. "When my wife gives me a blow job, she gets heartburn, and every time I pass a hot dog stand, I get a hard-on."

I must take every precaution not to get pregnant," said Edna to Priscilla.
"But I thought you said your hubby had a vasectomy," Priscilla responded.
"He did. That's why I have to take every precaution."