Daniel Jokes / Recent Jokes
This is Daniel Baldwin
Daniel Baldwin being arrested
and this is where his career is buried
In school, the professor asks:
-Who can tell me now who was the mother
of Moses? You, Daniel, should know, tell me!
Daniel, a young jewish child, stand up and
answers without hesitate:
- Moses mother was the faraoh's daughter!
- No, no, no, no, Daniel..., the faraoh's
daughter found him down the Nile, in a basket...
- Yeah, that's what she says
Neville, Daniel and Rhonda are floating in a life boat after their ship had sunk in the Atlantic. Neville sits up and looks about. He sees an island on the horizon, but can't believe his eyes. After conferring w/ the other two, they decide that there is no such thing as group hallucination and paddle toward the island.
They have not been on the island long when it begins to rain. This is another miracle, and the three believe that God is w/ them.
The following day, early in the morning, Rhonda starts screaming and wakes the other two. "It's a ship, it's a ship!" cries she.
The other two rise from their somnulescent posture and look. Sure enough, there is a ship on the horizon.
"We're saved, we're saved!" cry they, and begin to dance around in circles. As the ship comes closer, Daniel peers to catch the name on the starboard side: "The Titanic" he reads out slowly.
A young boy named Daniel had a bad dream in the middle of the night, so he ran into his Mum and Dads room.
He asks, "Can i get in please Mummy?"
His Dad, However, replies and says "Of course. Just dont look under the covers."
Daniel was curious and looked under the covers. He asks, "Daddy, what is that Mummy has?"
His Daddy says "Thats Mummy
Eight-year-old Daniel heard his grandmother tell his mother that a football was needed for the family dinner Sunday night. Daniel couldn't imagine why, but if he could help grandma prepare the meal, he would. But he didn't have a football, so he went over to Greg's house and traded 50 baseball cards for an old deflated football. He pumped it up, shined it and placed it on the kitchen table waiting for grandma to discover it.
' 'Daniel!'' his mother exclaimed,' 'You know Grandma is cooking tonight. Please put your things where they belong!''
Daniel was holding back the tears,' 'But it's for Grandma! She said she needed a football for dinner.''
Mother did her best to hold back the laughter,' 'You know Grandma and her Irish accent. She meant a FRUIT BOWL!''