Mein Jokes / Recent Jokes

'Twas the night before Chanukah, boychiks and maidels,
Not a sound could be heard, not even the dreidels.
The menorah was set on the chimney, just right,
In the kitchen my Bubbe hut gechapt a bite.
Salami, pastrami, a glessala tay
and zayerah pickles with bagels, oy vay!
Gezunt and geschmacht, the kindelech felt,
while dreaming of tegelach and Chanukah gelt.

The clock on the mantle it sure was a tickin',
and Bubbe was serving a schtickala chicken.
A tumult arose like a thousand bruchas,
Santa had fallen and broken his tuchas.
I put on my slippers, eins, tsvay, drei,
while Bubba was now on the herring and rye.
I grabbed my robe and buttoned my gotkes,
While Bubbe was so busy, devouring those latkes.

To the window I ran and to my surprise,
A little red yarmulke greeted my eyes.
When he got to the door and saw our menorah,
"Yiddishe kinder," he said, more...

Jeeto: Kal raat tum mujhe neend mein tumne mujhe gaaliyan di
Santa: Tumhari galat fahami hai.
Jeeto: Kaisi galatfahami?
Santa: Yehi ki mein soya tha.

jeet: Raabert, Test Match mein kyaa ho raha hai?
Raabert: Boss, Vivian Richards chhakke pe chhakka maar raha hai.
Ajeet: Saaleh ko sabak sikhana padega. Lunch break mein usse phone milana.
Raabert: Yes Boss.
Ajeet: (on phone, to Richards): Veeveeyun Reechards, tumhari Maa hamare
kabze mein hai. ......

Master: Mein tenu kutte te essay likhan nu keha si, Likh ke kyu nahi liyanda?
Student: Ki karda masterr g, jidan he mein kutte te Pen rakhia oh paj geya!! !

A potted version of the state of affairs in our country inscribed behind an autorickshaw:
Jheel par paani barasta hai, hamaarey deysh mein Kheyt paani ko tarasta hai, hamaarey deysh mein Zindgee ka haal khasta hai, hamaarey deysh. mein Insaan ka khoon sasta hai, hamaarey deysh mein Ab leedron, afsaron aur paagalon ko chhor kar Kaun khul kar hastua hai, hamaarey deysh mein? The rain fall on lakes in our land While fields go thirsty in our land
What lives of misery do we live in our land
Human blood is cheap in our land
Now besides leaders, officials and lunatics
No one laughs heartily in our land.