Nephew Jokes / Recent Jokes

An old man died and left his talking parrot to his nephew.
Unfortunately, the old man's language was not the cleanest, and it would seem that the parrot picked up on this. The nephew did not like this, and tried to break the parrot of its swearing habit. He tried everything. He played religious music, he was kind to the bird, he spent long hours trying to teach it manners. Finally, one day, he became so frustrated, he threw the parrot into the freezer.
"There," he said. "Maybe he'll cool off in there."
For the first few seconds, the parrot swore a blue streak inside that freezer. Then, suddenly, the parrot fell silent.
A few moments later, the nephew heard from within the freezer, "If you would be so kind as to let me out, I promise to rectify my unsavory vocabulary."
Shocked and surprised, the nephew quickly opened the door and removed the chilly but sedate bird. Before he could say anything, however, the parrot spoke.
"If more...

After considerable research, it has been discovered that the artist Vincent Van Gogh had many relatives. Among them were:
His dizzy aunt... Verti Gogh
The brother who ate prunes... Gotta Gogh
The constipated uncle... Cant Gogh
The brother who worked at a convenience store... Stopn Gogh
The grandfather from Yugoslavia... U Gogh
The cousin from Illinois... Chica Gogh
His magician uncle... Wherediddit Gogh
His Mexican cousin... Amee Gogh
The Mexican cousin's American half brother... Grin Gogh
The ballroom dancing aunt... Tan Gogh
A sister who loved disco... Go Gogh
The nephew who drove a stage coach... Wellsfar Gogh
The bird lover uncle... Flamin Gogh
His nephew psychoanalyst... E. Gogh
The fruit loving cousin... Man Gogh
An aunt who taught positive thinking... Wayto Gogh
The little bouncy nephew... Poe Gogh
The hairdresser... Washan Gogh
The marathon runner... Readysteady Gogh

A young man from the city went to visit his farmer uncle. For the first few days, the uncle showed him the usual things - chickens, cows, crops, etc. After three days, however, it was obvious that the nephew was getting bored, and the uncle was running out of things to amuse him with.
Finally, the uncle had an idea. "Why don't you grab a gun, take the dogs, and go shooting?"
This seemed to cheer the nephew up, and with enthusiasm, off he went, dogs in trail.
After a few hours, the nephew returned.
"How did you enjoy that?" asked the uncle.
"It was great!" exclaimed the nephew. "Got any more dogs?"

A young man from the city went to visit his farmer uncle. For the first few days, the uncle showed him the usual things - chickens, cows, crops, etc. After three days, however, it was obvious that the nephew was getting bored, and the uncle was running out of things to amuse him with.
Finally, the uncle had an idea. "Why don't you grab a gun, take the dogs, and go shooting?"
This seemed to cheer the nephew up, and with enthusiasm, off he went, dogs in trail. After a few hours, the nephew returned.
"How did you enjoy that?" asked the uncle.
"It was great!" exclaimed the nephew. "Got any more dogs?"

HEY HEY HEY Viper's in the fun house
with another joke!!!
See I've been doing some serious study into
Van Gough coz I wanted to know why the hell
anyone would chop off their ear. I guess
he just wanted an earing but went too far.
Anyway here's his family!
His obnoxious brother.......................... Please Gogh
His dizzy aunt. ............................... Verti Gogh
The brother who ate prunes..................... Gotta Gogh
The brother who worked at a convenience store..... Stopn Gogh
The grandfather from Yugoslavia.............. U Gogh
The brother who bleached his clothes white...... Hue Gogh
The cousin from Illinois................... Chica Gogh
His magician uncle............................ Wherediddy Gogh
His Mexican cousin............................. Amee Gogh
The Mexican cousin's American half brother..... Grin Gogh
The nephew who drove a stage coach. ........ Wellsfar Gogh
The more...

Prime Minister Zhang was fond of handwriting, but he didn't put in a lot of effort to do his exercises. Everybody sneered at his bad handwriting, and the Prime Minister himself really didn't care. One day he happened to draft a beautiful sentence and at once wielded his writing brush to write it down, indeed, there were dragons flying and snakes dancing all over the paper. Then he ordered his nephew to copy it. When beginning to copy, his nephew stared tongue-tied and did not know where to start. The young man had to take the manuscript back to the Prime Minister. "Uncle, I can't read your handwriting, please tell me what words they are." The Prime Minister read his cursive hand a long time, and did not know what Chinese characters they were, either. He then turned to blame his nephew. "Why didn't you come earlier to ask me? I myself have forgotten the words which I've written."

A young man was visiting his brother and sister-in-law and was surprised to find his young nephew, Timmy, helping them bake the cupcakes. After they were done, his sister-in-law allowed Timmy to put the icing on. When he had finished, he brought them to the table.

"The cupcakes look delicious, Tim." his uncle said. And he took a bite while looking at the other cupcakes. "Timmy these are so good."

As he finished one and took another he again complimented his little nephew. "The cupcakes look beautiful, Tim," his uncle said. "How did you get them iced so evenly?" And he took a large bite while waiting for the answer.

His nephew replied, "I licked them."