Obsessed Jokes

4 women enter an obsession class with their children to learn about and deal with their odsession.
the consuleor says to the first mom:
"your obsessed with money, you named your daughter penny."
then the mom takes her kid and leaves
the consuleor says to the second mom:
"your obsessed with food you named your daughter candy."
then the mom takes her kid and leaves
the consuleor says to the third mom:
" your obsessed with alcohol. you named your kid brandy"
then the mom takes her kid and leaves.
then the fourth mom whispers to her kid this is ridiculous, come on Dick were leaving.

The other day some friends and I were discussing one of the few
recurrent philosophical topics that come up in our conversations:
society as a whole. It was taking its usual course; one of my friends
insisted that society was going to hell, the other was somewhat
neutral, and I thought that people were simply becoming more tolerant
of differences.
My first friend announced (again) that society was on a steady
down-hill road. "Everyone today," she said, "is either messed up in
the head, a druggie, or a nymphomaniac."
My other friend laughed and nodded. Never having heard the word
before, I puzzled over what' nymphomaniac' could mean.
Trying not to sound stupid, I swallowed my pride and asked, "What's
that?"
"A girl who's obsessed with sex," explained my second friend.
I paused for a moment, thinking. I then turned and asked them, "Then
what is a guy obsessed with more...

ADA: A Dumb Arrangement
ADA: A Dumb Acronym
ADA: A Dumb Annoyance
BASIC: Boring And Shamelessly Idiotic Coders
BASIC: Badly Assembled, Severely Illogical Code
BASIC: Beginner's Algorithms for Seemingly Infinite Confusion
C: Crud
C: Confusing
COBOL: Completly Outdated, Badly Overused Language
COBOL: Completly Overused, Badly Outdated Language
COBOL: Cowards Only Buy Outdated Languages
COBOL: Cowards Only Build Outdated Languages
COBOL: Crap Operated By Obsessed lunatics
COBOL: Crap Often Bothers Our Lethargy
COBOL: Crap Ostracized By Our Loathing
COBOL: Compiles Only Because Of Luck
COBOL: Cumbersome, Overdone, Badly Organized Language
COBOL: Coded Only By Obsessed Lunatics
FORTRAN: Files Only Run Through Right At Never-neverland
LISP: Lots of Insanely Stupid Parentheses
LISP: Lots of Irritating Superfluous Parentheses
PASCAL: Programmers Against Structured Code And Language

The other day some friends and I were discussing one of the few recurrent philosohical topics that come up in our conversations: society as a whole. It was taking its usual course; one of my friends insisted that society was going to hell, the other was somewhat neutral, and I thought that people were becoming more tolerating of differences.
My first friend announced (again) that society was on a steady down-hill road. “Everyone today, ” she said, “Is messed up in the mind, a druggie, or a nymphomaniac. ”
My other friend laughed and nodded. Never having heard the word before, I puzzled over what ‘nymphomaniac’ could mean.
Trying not to sound stupid, I swallowed my pride and asked, “What’s that? ”
“A girl who’s obsessed with sex, ” explained my second friend.
I paused for a moment, thinking. “Then what, ” I asked, “Is a guy obsessed with sex? ”
My first friend had an answer immediately, “Normal! ”

ADA: A Dumb Arrangement
ADA: A Dumb Acronym
ADA: A Dumb Annoyance

BASIC: Boring And Shamelessly Idiotic Coders
BASIC: Badly Assembled, Severely Illogical Code
BASIC: Beginner's Algorithms for Seemingly Infinite Confusion

C: Crud
C: Confusing

COBOL: Completly Outdated, Badly Overused Language
COBOL: Completly Overused, Badly Outdated Language
COBOL: Cowards Only Buy Outdated Languages
COBOL: Cowards Only Build Outdated Languages
COBOL: Crap Operated By Obsessed lunatics
COBOL: Crap Often Bothers Our Lethargy
COBOL: Crap Ostracized By Our Loathing
COBOL: Compiles Only Because Of Luck
COBOL: Cumbersome, Overdone, Badly Organized Language
COBOL: Coded Only By Obsessed Lunatics

FORTRAN: Files Only Run Through Right At Never-neverland

LISP: Lots of Insanely Stupid Parentheses
LISP: Lots of Irritating Superfluous Parentheses

PASCAL: Programmers Against more...