Porn Jokes / Recent Jokes
1.If you come to a fork in the road, take it!...Yogi Berra
2.Life's like a Kit-Kat Bar: Gimmie a break...Sean Ryan
3.I went to the store to buy camouflage pants, but I couldn't find them...Sean Ryan
3.If you ever fall off the Space Needle, just go real limp, because people on the ground will think you're a dummy, and they'll try to catch you, because, hey, free dummy...Jack Handey
4.Probably the earliest fly swatters were nothing more than some sort of striking surface attached to a long stick...Jack Handey
Anonymous quotes
5.Hmmm....why do we park on driveways and drive on parkways?
6.Yeah...and pay on freeways?
7.You can't have manslaughter without laughter.
A new Trainee was workin in a porno shop. The manager had to go out for a minute and asked if he could handle the shop on his own. He said yes. A few minutes after, a wite woman comes in and asked for black porn. THe trainee says that it costs $35. THen, a black womaon comes in and asks for white porn. THe trainee also says that the porn regardless of weather it is black of white porn costs $35. After she left, a blonde came in and looked at the porn. The blonde then asks what that tinket up there was. THe trainee says that is costs $162. The blonde buyed it. THen, the manager comes back in and asks him how much he made. THe trainee then says that he sold black and white porn and that little trinket on your desk to a blonde for 162 dollers! THe managers hen says that the item was his thermos.
I was on a porn site and saw a thumbnail entitled "Tranny Has A Great Ass". Oh yeah, that just totally makes up for the cock, doesn't it?
The things I've learnt from porn:
Women wear high heels to bed.
A blowjob will always get a woman out of a speeding fine.
Lesbians love it when a guy bursts in on them.
All women are bisexual or have fantasised about it.
No man is bisexual.
Women hitchhike in high heels and bikinis and will always offer you sex in exchange for a ride to who knows where.
If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having a root in the bushes, the boyfriend won't bash you if you join in without asking.
Job interviews often turn into orgies.
Nurses give patients blowjobs especially if they have multiple bandages or are in a coma. The patient always makes a miraculous recovery.
When a complete stranger asks a sunbathing woman to rub suntan lotion over her breasts she doesn't tell him to F#@% off.
She will insist he roots her.
Calling a woman a bitch won't get you thrown out of bed. It turns her on even more.
French maids and baby sitters are more...