Troubled Jokes / Recent Jokes

Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife
1.0. I soon noticed
that the new program began unexpected child processing
that took up a lot of
space and valuable resources.
In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other
programs and now
monitors all other system activity. Applications
such as Poker Night
10.3, Football 5.0, Golf 7.5, Barhopping 6.9 &
Racing 3.6 no longer run,
crashing the system whenever selected
I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while
attempting to run
my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going
back to Girlfriend 7.0, but
the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0.
Please help!
Thanks,
A Troubled User.
______________________________________
REPLY:
Dear Troubled User:
This is a very common problem that men complain about.
Many people upgrade
from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it
is just a Utilities more...

Once Santa And Banta Bought 2 Horses. But They Were Very Confused. They Were Troubled Because They Could Not Recognise Their Horses. After Some Time Santa Hit Upon An Idea. He Said That He Would Cut The Tail Of His Horse. Banta Said O. K. But Banta Had The Disease Of Night Walking. He Got Up In Night And Cut The Tail Of His Own Horse Too. In The Morning Both Of Them Were Surprised To See That The Tail Of Bantas Horse Wetre Notthere. Then Tehy Were Agin Troubled. Thistime Santa Had The Idea To Cut The Legs Of His Horse. But That Idea Also Failed. Then Both Of Them Started Thinking Seriously. Then Banta Said That, "I Have An Idea". Santa Asked What. Then Banta Told Him That," I Will Take The Black Horse And You Will Take The White Horse

An English teacher, troubled by the unwillingness of boys in her class to take any interest in composition, attempted to arouse them by asking for a description of a baseball game. It was a fortunate idea for most of the boys were eager to tell what they knew about the sport.

Only one lanky fellow disappointed the teacher's hopes. He chewed on his pencil for a few moments before he scratched a few words and turned in his paper. On the paper he wrote. .."Rain. No Game."

A small village was troubled by a man-eating lion. So its leaders senta message to the great hunter, Jonesie, to come and kill the beast. For several nights the hunter lay in wait for the lion, but it never appeared. Finally, he told the village chief to kill a cow and give himits hide. Draping the skin over his shoulders, he went to the pasture towait for the lion. In the middle of the night, the villagers woke to the sound of blood-curdling shrieks coming from the pasture. As they carefully approached, they saw the hunter on the ground, groaning in pain. There was no sign of the lion."What happened, Jonesie? Where is the lion?" asked the chief."Forget the damn lion!" he howled. "Which one of you idiots let the bull loose?"

[Royters: Dateline Washington]
Joe Motzeratz Reporting
Justice Department Siege Section's Helicopters & Tanks Rolling Towards Redmond
With the clock ticking ever closer to the deadline imposed by the Justice Department and the leaders of the Redmond WA based cult promising a fight to the end, Attorney General Janet Reno has informed the Justice Department's Siege Section to start the helicopters and tanks rolling towards Microsoft's campus in Redmond Washington; as well as cutting off the avenues of escape for Cult Leader Gates to his fortified redoubt on the lake, known as "C:/"..
Attorney General Reno stated that with such a formidable foe as Microsoft, and their response to her edict, that it would have to be a Take No Prisoners operation as the threat to the community at large is even more egregious than the mentally troubled widow in Illinois, and a much greater threat than the situation that first propelled her to prominence.
Apparently, Attorney more...