Vanilla Jokes / Recent Jokes
This is a weird but true story (with a moral). .. A complaint was received by the Pontiac Division of General Motors: "This is the second time I have written you, and I don't blame you for not answering me, because I kind of sounded crazy, but it is a fact that we have a tradition in our family of ice cream for dessert after dinner each night. But the kind of ice cream varies so, every night, after we've eaten, the whole family votes on which kind of ice cream we should have and I drive down to the store to get it. It's also a fact that I recently purchased a new Pontiac and since then my trips to the store have created a problem. You see, every time I buy vanilla ice cream, when I start back from the store my car won't start. If I get any other kind of ice cream, the car starts just fine. I want you to know I'm serious about this question, no matter how silly it sounds:' What is there about a Pontiac that makes it not start when I get vanilla ice cream, and easy to start more...
The young man entered the Ice Cream Palace and asked, "What kinds of ice cream do you have?" "Vanilla, chocolate, strawberry," the girl wheezed as she spoke, patted her chest and seemed unable to continue. "Do you have laryngitis?" the young man asked sympathetically. "Nope," she whispered, "just vanilla, chocolate and strawberry."
A gangster mob is deliberating over methods they will employ in robbing
their next bank. After several previous successful bank heists, they
all
agree on the way to go about it, and in the wee hours of the following
morning, embark on their plans to get rich yet again.
Once inside the bank, efforts at disabling the internal security system got
under way immediately. The robbers were expecting one or two huge safes
filled with cash and valuables, but were surprised (and happy) to see
hundreds of smaller safes scattered strategically throughout the bank.
The first safe's combination was easy to crack. Inside the robbers were
surprised to find only vanilla pudding.
"Well" said one robber to the other, "At least we get a bit to eat."
The second safe also contained nothing but vanilla pudding, and the
process
continued until all the safes were opened and there was not a dollar, a
diamond, nor an more...
What do you call a Chinese rapper? Vanilla Rice
"What flavors of ice cream do you have?" inquired the customer.
"Vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate," answered the new waitress in a hoarse whisper. Trying to be sympathetic, the customer asked, "Do you have laryngitis?"
"No...." replied the new waitress with some effort, "just... erm....
vanilla, strawberry, and chocolate."