Bailout Jokes / Recent Jokes

According to the NY Times, it seems that Verizon will likely recieve over a billion dollars of stimulus money to bring fast internet connections to rural and low-income areas. Soon, people living in Newark and Georgia will be able to go online to see that they have no money in their savings account at 128 kilobit per second.

A lady here died this past January, and Citibank billed her for February and March for their service charges on her credit card, and then added late fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00, now is somewhere around $60.00. A family member placed a call to Citibank:

Family Member: "I am calling to tell you that she died in January."

Citibank: "The account was never closed and the late fees and charges still apply."

Family Member: "Maybe, you should turn it over to collections."

Citibank: "Since it is two months past due, it already has been."

Family Member: So, what will they do when they find out she is dead?"

Citibank: "Either report her account to the frauds division or report her to the credit bureau, maybe both!"

Family Member: "Do you think God will be mad at her?"

Citibank: "Excuse me?"

Family more...

Iona College,located 20 miles north of New York City,is known as the Gaels.However,they are thinking about switching to a more aggressive, dangerous name..........the Iona Toyota.

Joseph A. Oliver III has been let go as president and CEO of bankrupt discount menswear retailer S&K Famous Brands Inc. Oliver said he next plans to move to Japan and open a string of Big and Tall stores.