Britney Jokes / Recent Jokes

In the Dec. 11 issue of Rolling Stone Britney Spears says her sons Sean Preston, 3, and Jayden James, 2, already have potty mouths. She says that Sean Preston has used the F-word. In Sean Preston's defense, sometimes it's hard not to drop the F-bomb when a car cuts you off in traffic.

There were these 3 Filipino girls, and they were the ugliest Filipino girls ever! They finally got so tired of being ugly that they decide to go to the doctor's for help. The doctor looks at them and says, "Well, this is a tough one, but this is what you have to do; jump into a river and say the name of someone you think is beautiful and you will look exactly like that person." So the first one goes and says "Britney Spears" and when she gets out of the water she looked just like Britney Spears. Then the second one went and she said "Alyssa Milano" and became Alyssa Milano. Then came the third one... When she jumped into the river (being so terrified of swimming) said "AY TA-E!" (means shit)

Mr. Eric was walking around the form 3 block when he saw one of the form 3 class, 3'T', making noise. He entered the classroom and this is what happened....
Mr. Eric: Who was playing and talking please stand up or the whole class gets it.
Anand: "Will The Real Slim Shady Please Stand Up"(Eminem)
Mr. Eric: You! I want you to come to my office now Office Time: 0900hrs
Mr. Eric: What Is Your name?
Anand: "Say My Name Say My Name"(Destiny's Child)
Mr. Eric: Don't play a fool
Anand: "Can't Believe I'm The Fool Again"(Westlife)
Mr. Eric: Do you want me to beat you?
Anand: "Hit Me Baby One More Time"(Britney Spears)
Mr Eric: What did u say?
Anand: "WHAT!"(Stone Cold)
Mr. Eric: Are you out of your head? Anand: "I Can't Get U Outta My Head"(Kylie Minogue)
Mr. Eric: Who do you think you are?
Anand: "I'm A Genie In Bottle"(Christina Aguilera)
Mr. Eric: more...

There's 4 people on a plane and one is the smartest man in the world, one's a hippie, ones the president and one is britney spears. the plane is about to crash and there's only three parachutes so the president says, " I think i deserve a parachute, afterall, i am the president." So he takes the parachute and jumps out of the plane. Next britney spears says, " I think i should use the next parachute afterall, i am britney spears." so she jumped out of the plane. then there was only the hippie and the smartest man. They were debating who should use the next parachute and the hippie said, "i dont think we have to worry about anything like that, britney spears just jumped out with my backpack. and they jumped out of the plane.