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A sheep herder made it in to San Antonio, Texas, after 10 years in the bush.
He found a saloon and approached the bar tender. He told the bartender "I need a woman."
The bartender said, "There are women all over San Antone for a price."
The sheep herder replied, "Just any woman won't do. I ain't fucked nothin' but goats 'n sheep for the last ten years. They got cockle burrs 'n mesquite thorns around their pussy and my old dick is tough with calluses on it, and I need a good tough piece of ass."
So the bartender tells him, "Well, you're in luck. The toughest broad in all San Antonio has a room right up stairs." The bartender picks up the phone contacts the lady, explains the situation, and tells the sheep herder to go
on up.
The sheep herder gets a small ice bucket with two Lone Star long necks (the favorite brew in San Atone), and proceeds up the stairs.
When he gets to the room he says, "The barkeep told me you more...

A big brown bear came out of the hills and walked into a bar in Boulder, Colorado.
The big brown bear sat down at the bar and said, "Hey bartender, bring me a beer." The bartender replied, "Sorry, buddy, we can't serve big brown bears beer, bourbon, brandy or other bubbly booze at beer bars in Boulder."
The big brown bear noticed that a big buxom blonde broad with big boobs was back behind the bar, so the big brown bear said to the bartender, "Hey bartender, I still want a beer, and if you don't bring me a beer, I'm goin' back behind the bar and I'm goin' to eat that big buxom blonde broad with the big boobs." The bartender replied, "Sorry, buddy, but we still don't serve big brown bears beer, bourbon, brandy or other bubbly booze at beer bars in Boulder."
So, the big brown bear jumped back behind the bar and ate the big buxom blonde broad with the big boobs.
The big brown bear then got back on his chair and said, "Now, more...

Guess the following movie quotes. All movies were released between the years 1980 and 1989. Comedies, dramas, action, etc. Some are quite simple, and others are more difficult.

There are 37 items, followed by the answers at the bottom, so you may wish to save reading this for a less hectic portion of your day.

1) Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?

2) We're on a mission from God.

3) People on' ludes should not drive.

4) This house is clean.

5) Shall we play a game?

6) Terrific!! I've got a trig mid-term tomorrow, and I'm being chased by Guido the killer pimp.

7) Back off man, I'm a scientist.

8) That's why they call them crushes. If they were easy, they'd call them something else.

9) I know a little German. He's sitting over there.

10) Can I borrow your towel, my car just hit a water buffalo.

11) Excuse me, Dick, I mean Rich, will milk be more...