United States Jokes / Recent Jokes

Nobel laureate biologist Jim Watson apologized "unreservedly" Thursday for stating that black people were "not as intelligent as whites".

Fellow Nobel prize winner Al Gore was appalled by the comments because the committee that awarded him was all "stupid white people".

It was announced today that Phelps newest sponsor is in fact Rosetta Stoned.
There was no comment from the Phelps camp on this but there was a "skunkish" smell in the air and alot of coughing was heard.
The Olympic Committee annouced today that there will be another event added to the swimming competition. The 100m bongstroke.

A judge in Delaware has ordered a man who twice exposed himself to a 10-year-old girl to wear a T-shirt with the words, “I am a registered sex offender.” I just hope Urban Outfitters has his size.

In an odd bit of news, a woman in China has a 5-inch horn growing out of her forehead. When hearing this story Bill Clinton said he was suprised cause he thought Hillary was the only one who could grow horns out of her head.

Wow, Obama is recycling Clintonistas! How's that for a change?!
I wonder if there is a position for Monica Lewinski?

The courts allowed the bankruptcy proceedings for Chrysler to go forward this week. The bankruptcy was approved after the judge told Chrysler to sit in a room for a few minutes while the judge went to talk to his manager.

Miami believes it's found a way to lure LeBron James and Chris Bosh to the Heat. It's called "a miracle."