Bailout Jokes / Recent Jokes
The Emperor - sorry, the President - has quietly claimed sweeping new powers allowing him to open Americans' mail without a judge's warrant.
Sources say he'll use this new authority to finally get his own Capital One "No Hassle Rewards" card.
Police have arrested three executives from a troubled western Nebraska car dealership where 81 Ford and Toyota vehicles worth roughly $2.5 million vanished in recent days. The good news is that Ford and Toyota had insurance on the vehicles. The bad news is they were insured through AIG.
A spokesperson for AIG said the executvies were not available for comment. Yesterday they had taken the company jet to the French Riviera for a three-week working vacation.
Today Bums and Beggars came out of the woodwork(and the woods) to rewrite their cardboard signs to exhibit the American spirit and take advantage of new opportunities. Their new signs read:
'I'm a candidate for change, can you spare any?'
They just nod as they walk up to you and mouth the all familiar "Yes We Can"
The man said he was taking advantage of the "Crack for Clunkers" program.
I tried to trade in my big old run-down clunker but was told my wife didn't qualify.
The F.D.I.C., which insures bank accounts, plans to borrow money frombanks. In related banking news, the National Blood Bank has just namedDracula as their new director.