United States Jokes / Recent Jokes
A national slavery museum near battlefields in Fredericksburg, VA, where confederate soldiers fought to preserve slavery, remains unfinished nearly five years after a ceremonial groundbreaking. In a case of history repeating itself, contractors blame the projects' delay on troubles with the union.
I have been hit hard by the recession and I am broke. I am so broke that I have broken into my emergency kit and am living off the coffee grinds and canned food. The entire time I am thinking, “Wow, thank God for PTSD, Crazy Uncle Ronnie, and tales of Vietnamese jungle survival.”
Vice President Biden says Cheney was'dead wrong' in his criticism of the new administration's security policy. Cheney says Biden is'half right'.
...Las Vegas continues to come up with interesting promotions in order to attract business. I stopped at a gas station next to a gentleman's club that advertised "Free Sex w/ Fill-up." I pulled up next to the pump, paid the attractive attendant, and was given a ticket that i could redeem around the back of the station. When I got there there was a big, burly, gnarly looking dude by the door. I asked him if he was the ticket taker and he replied, "No. I'm Philip."
Nancy Pelosi was visting her home district when the quake occurred. In fact, she and her husband were making love when the quake hit. Pelosi's husband said it was the first time in ten years that she moved during sex.
Mr. Toyota made a statement that fixing safety problems is a number one priority. When asked if he was satisfied with that statement Joe Biden stated, “I think we should hear what Mr. General Motors has to say.”
The Pentagon is recommending President Bush add 92,000 soldiers to the military over the next five years. Bush responded by saying, "Now where are we going to get that many poor people?"